Separated by the Plagues

Not fifteen minutes ago, I was thinking about a friend of mine who has more money than I do (you know, one of those rare individuals out there) and I’m getting into my “if only I had…”, “why me”, “I should have…”, “it’s so easy for him” thoughts.

All of a sudden I’m feeling angry and feeling sorry for myself; all the usual suspects show up to play their parts in my long running, block buster, award winning, return engagement of:

“What about me?”

Actors, take your places; little Steven, you’re over there in the corner, no one notices you, and don’t say anything.

You, the siblings, go over there on top of that pedestal, under all the lights and wait for the attention.

You, the two older actors, the parents, you act busy and distracted, and if you do happen to look up from whatever you’re doing, focus on the kids up on the pedestal, only.

OK, take 10, 375; actors take your places, action, roll it…

Come on, do I really want to live through this movie? Again?

When I’m living from this “story”, the impact is anger, jealousy, insecurity, and certainly not a whole lot of gratitude. And joy? From this place? Maybe if my friend looses all his money. Or better yet, if he needs to borrow some from me. Certainly not qualities of being that are conducive to being in intimate relationship with Love and Presence.

Being in Egypt. We’re enslaved in the land of constrictions (Mitzrayim). We’re trapped in our own small minds. We’re working so hard to satisfy some delusional, hard hearted fantasy. We breathe shallowly. We’re too busy for deep connection.

We can go on like this for years, maybe generations.

We can’t leave and experience intimacy with the Divine, not even for three days running.

How does going down into these strange lands in any way answer Avraham’s question: How do I know my children will inherit the land they were promised, inherit their true selves?

It’s usually through some intervening force that we are able to distinguish our true selves from our constricted “stories”. That force may be Higher Consciousness as is, or it may come in the form of someone, like a friend or teacher. Somehow, like the plagues in Egypt, a more conscious, essential self (us) is distinguished from a previously unconscious enslavement.

However, if our personal patterns of thinking “work” well enough and just keep on coasting along, our higher consciousness might not wake up and distinguish itself from its maze. But if the essence of who we are descends far enough into a vortex of enslaved and painful delusional thinking we might be forced to call out, in simple truth, to return home; simple consciousness returning to Itself.

The desire that arises from that place of Mitzrayim may be the guarantee that Avraham was given. And the call from that desire might be the most real connection we ever make.

Have a great Shabbos,

Simcha Frischling